The mood for this year, as articulated to a friend tonight is: nervous.
I have a lot that I want to accomplish. I have a lot that I want to fix. I want to feel better. I want to feel in control. I want to be cruising calmly in blue skies and not careening along just above the treetops, clipping off branches and wincing at every noise.
I don’t know if I can do it all. I don’t know if the little bit I can do every day will be enough.
But it’s what I’ve got to work with. Bits and pieces.
So hopefully that will be enough.
In bits and pieces is where I feel like I’ve landed after the last five years.
In bits and pieces we will try to build something new.
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Also, I don’t know if I will ever have time to learn how to animate/make an animatic in between the thousand and one things that I want to do always, but this song was recommended to me by the almighty algorithm while I was out on the walk where the above photo happened, and I wish I could make something that moves to it. It would be about Heinrich during his time on Earth, because of course it would.
He’s around my age then, looking back on his own several years of disaster that he technically came out of in one piece, and yet also in several thousand invisible little pieces. We’re not the same at all, but there’s still a reason I hang onto him so tightly.